Dear Married People: Have More Fun! – 7 Ways to Start

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Would you use the word "fun" to describe your marriage?  

Did you start off viewing your wedding and getting married with more enthusiasm and enjoyment than you currently do?  If you're like most married couples you would probably answer yes.  

With time, though, you may have gotten stalled by routines or bogged down by the seriousness of such an important relationship and the administrative matters connected to having a household and a family.

You may try to have fun when you can, but time and again, you find that more urgent matters take center stage in your life.

I’m here to remind you: Have more fun!

There may never a shortage of weighty matters to handle in a marriage. But, guess what? Making time for fun is just as crucial.  Plus, it makes those weighty matters easier to handle.

So, how can you get started with putting the lighter side of life in the limelight of your relationship?

7 Ways to Include More Fun in Your Marriage

Look for opportunities to:

1. Reminisce and dream together

Remember the beginning of your relationship? You can go back to that and relive some of the fun things you did then. Or you can reminisce about your childhood or dream together about your future. It can inspire and encourage the heart and let you explore the lighter side of life.

Some examples:

  • Getting dressed up and going to a fancy place, whether it’s a special occasion or not.
  • Going through old photo albums, looking at your wedding video and mementos from when you dated, and just reminiscing about your lives.
  • Doing something silly that reminds you of your childhood, like catching lightning bugs, making snow angels, having a snowball fight, or visiting a roller skating rink.

2. Enjoy the simple pleasures of life

Having fun doesn’t have to be synonymous with being expensive or spectacular. The fun of things is experiencing them together. Enjoy each other’s company! So, don’t ever take the little things for granted.

Some examples:

  • Work on a puzzle or building something together, like an ice cream sundae or a pizza with your favorite toppings.
  • Take a bike ride around the neighborhood or countryside, exploring, stopping in at a cafe or getting ice cream or frozen yogurt.
  • In the fall, finding a corn maze and just getting lost can be a lot of fun. Raking leaves together, making a pile, and then jumping in them. Or building a fire in a fireplace and enjoying s’mores together.

3. Start a new hobby or activity together

Either figure out what interests you both have or just do something unusual that you normally wouldn’t have tried alone. Stay open-minded and have fun with exploring new activities.

Some examples:

  • Learning to paint, dancing lessons, cooking or baking courses, or getting sweaty together at a local gym class.
  • Camping in tents, going canoeing, or hiking and rock climbing is not only fun but also builds teamwork.
  • Doing something brainy together, like attending a seminar or a college course to expand your knowledge of something technological or scientific.

4. Be spontaneous and even a little crazy

There’s nothing better for getting out of the rut of a routine than being spontaneous. It doesn’t have to be insane or extreme.  Just a little on the wild and unusual side will work.

Some examples:

  • Hopping in the car and going for a ride—to another state or to a special and romantic place. Or just driving without any agenda or destination at all and singing to your favorite songs loudly. No plans required.
  • Having a naked dinner—or a whole naked day! Perhaps visiting a nudist colony. Yep. It’s strangely liberating.
  • Getting caught in the rain is so much fun! Dancing in the rain even more so! And kissing in the rain… well, no need to say anything more!

5. Laugh at Life

It’s a fact that children laugh a whole lot more than adults do. Do something silly together and stop being so serious! Laughter is wonderfully healing and strengthens your relationship.

Some examples:

  • Go to a public place and make up goofy stories about the people you encounter.  What roles would they play if you were writing a novel?
  • Communicate in a made-up language, not worrying about when others look at you strangely. Just be you and laugh!
  • Go to an arcade or an inexpensive amusement park, playing silly arcade games for a handful of quarters like kids, and trying to impress your spouse… or laughing at your own clumsiness.

6. Completely unplug

Ah, yes, the fun of pretending or being all alone, roughing it, being completely unreachable. Create your own private blackout—no internet, no computer, no TV, no phones. Nothing. Try it for a whole day if you can. What could you do with all that unplugged time?

Some examples:

  • Snuggling. The ultimate form of intimacy when you’re not having a sexual encounter.
  • Reading to each other. Being your own entertainment can be fun, especially when you add distinct voices for all the characters in the book.
  • Taking a long, hot bath. Adding candles, music, scents, and some champagne.

7. Plan a getaway

Of course, you can never literally and completely escape from the demands of everyday life. But there’s just something about physically getting away from your routine environment. And it doesn’t always have to cost a lot of money to get a change of scenery.

Some examples:

  • Traveling to a romantic, exotic beach getaway. It’s the ultimate fun time!
  • Spending a weekend in a tranquil cottage or a day trip to a beautiful lake with a stay at a bed and breakfast.
  • Going on a road trip to explore some of your own state’s natural wonders.

Above and beyond all, remember to always prioritize your marriage. So, think about the last time you and your spouse truly had fun together. If it’s been so long that you can’t remember, it’s time to re-evaluate your priorities. Make time to prudently set boundaries—and stick to them—to simply enjoy life as a married couple and have more fun!